CONSPIRACY FM

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Afternoon, truth-seekers!


So, it came to my attention early this morning that there was supposed to be a new Mepsi ad running for the first time on the radio today. I had been waiting to record it so that I could upload it for you to listen to, but I had been unable to find the right station!

Eventually, after turning the dial on my radio for minutes on end trying to get it to change station, I realized that the sound I was hearing was my ridiculous dorm-mate loudly singing to himself down the hall… I’d been thinking the strange, muffled music was a sign that my radio was broken but, as it turned out, it simply needed a new pair of batteries.

After checking my room for signs of “bird”-related sabotage and closing the blinds for good measure, I replaced the batteries and, to my surprise, found that I had accidentally tuned into a very strange station indeed! After a few minutes of listening, I found where the broadcast seemed to loop and recorded a sample to upload here, after cleaning it up a little, of course:

(Listen to the audio clip here)

Judging by the failing strength of the signal when I tried to tune in away from Kraken Academy, it would seem that the transmitter is located somewhere near the Academy itself… Honestly, dear followers, the contents of the broadcast remind me most of the sounds I heard when I was abducted by extraterrestrials, just before I woke up at Kraken Academy for the first time…

Wait, could it be possible that the extraterrestrials who brought me here are the very same extraterrestrial lizard-people that run the soda companies…?! Dammit, it’s so obvious! I can’t believe I didn’t see this before! This broadcast from somewhere within the Academy must be related to Mepsi Corp. somehow—I need to decode this immediately!


Don’t drink the Mepsi!


- KK

Join the investigation at https://discord.com/invite/J2dSfmH

 

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